I reacted as if it was nothing when my friend told me the news. But there was a part of me that felt the kind of sadness that my friend was experiencing at that time. The part of me that likes to lament on how suck-y life is nowadays.

You couldn't blame me for that because how often you have come to face a close person (friend's brother is considered quite close for me) that have to face a probability of hanging because of smuggling drugs?

To be honest, i am angry. I am angry because you can't really put the blame on anyone for this incident happening. Sure, maybe they are some people that are directly responsible for what happened but could we entirely blame a person just for this incident happening?
As much as we want to point fingers when things like this happen, we can't. Everyone played a part be it his family, friends and the environment he grew in.

As i am writing this, his family are eagerly praying for a miracle and a second chance but deep down inside, we all know that once you have been caught smuggling drugs in Malaysia, you're done for (PA lesson from Mr K).

This pretty adds up to my frustration that have been building up the past few days. Who can we really blame?
I think the answer would be how our society and human brain is wired today.

To tell you the truth, i've given up hope on this world a long time ago, not the world maybe, but rather the people and the Devil who pretty much put the world in a pretty screwed up stage.

I'm sure that anywhere you go, you can constantly see desperadoes constantly trying to climb up the invisible ladder or hierarchy in society to outdo each other and to prove who's better in life.
The theory that says everyone is equal is total bullshit as far as humans are concerned.

Just try to look around you, how many people that actually treats all of the people they know as equal if not greater? If given the chance, all of us would want to be the best, first in everything.
Just ask yourself, if given a chance, would you want people to look up to you in awe or to just ignore you? I'm sure you would definitely choose the first answer.

Sigh, maybe this is what is pissing me off so much.
To constantly see the actors and actresses performing their show just to gain the temporary approval from their fellow humans. How far would they go to perfect their act, ad all the actions they would take - knowing it is wrong - just to enjoy the temporary satisfaction.

I'm just too tired of these shows. It just makes you want to throw up just looking at it.

GOD HAVE MERCY

I should be studying instead of sitting here updating my blog but heck, how many people could really glue themselves to the chair unless they really used the Super BB glue, literally.
Willpower is something that i lack, especially when it comes to studying.
It is hard even to keep my eyes open when i have to face with the never ending line of words or formulas that people called as chemistry, maths and PA.

I know STPM is just around the corner but it seems that whenever i want to seriously sit down and study, i can always find simple excuses to escape and thus avoid the dread and terror of having to crack my brains or to fight the urge to close my eyes due to the lack of willpower.

Sigh, why Malaysian education system just can't take Finland's for example?

In Finland, i heard that students were allowed to go on their own pace and to explore their interests through their education system.
The education system there are also not too exam oriented, where coursework all around the year carry more marks compared to the single shit, ops, i mean sheet, of paper that you get 3 months after sitting through the grueling experience of having your brain and hands breaking down due to overwork.

Finland sure sound nice, at least maybe there i'll get to be the next child genius. Too late i'm too old anyway.