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Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Random

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1. The only OCBC bank ATM in the whole campus has broken down, which means i will have to go without any cash til some people fix that stupid machine. Thank God this is Singapore or else i have to wait for months before having the chance to eat using cash again.


2. Mid terms, mid terms!
Why is everyone getting so agitated while i'm so relaxed?
Why is the MCQ question even harder than the essay question?
Why on earth do they call it mid terms when the final exam is just 2 weeks away?
Shouldn't it be something like three quarter term exam?


3. I think i'm gonna die of diabetes or heart attack sooner or later considering the type of food the hostel provides and the lack of exercise i do to compensate for that.
Well, at least i'm doing some finger exercise now by updating this blog but God knows how many million words i have to type just to burn everything off.


4. NUS has finally found a new name!
It's National University of Scandals!
And i made it into the top students list!
How i wish this was true for the real NUS....
Study would be so much more fun.


5. There's this depressing news i read that says Arts and Social Science students in NUS have only 64% chance of getting employed.
Maybe i should start considering to switch courses now...


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Saturday, September 26, 2009

Inside Luke's Brain

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How Luke Phang Cher Hong's brain really works:


Gosh exam is just two days away...
Should i study?
I guess i should... but for how long?
1 hour? 2 hours?
Nah, 2 hours is just too long.
Maybe i'll study for 1 hour and go take a nap.

Ok, i'll do that after i finish doing my Facebook chores (fighting with other Mafias, building new buildings for my city, hunting a few mice) first.
Eh, someone posted a photo of me in Facebook!
*Checks out the photo and adds a whole bunch of comments into that photo and photos next to that photo*

*MSN beeps*
Hmm, i wonder who's that?
Oh its a girl!
It won't hurt if i chat with her a while right?

*Finally flips open a page of his textbook*
Yawn... this is boring.
Why can't they just make lessons more like computer games?
Which reminds me!
I need to hunt that wolf and save the princess!
*Goes off to play computer game*

*After hours in the game, finally comes back to study*
Bla, bla, bla.... i wonder what's for dinner tonight?
I cant wait for dinner... hope can eat at McD though...

*Turns to second page of the book*
Maybe i can play a game of DOTA after dinner!
Hope others would join..... hmm Garena or LAN?

*After a few minutes...*
Okay!
Guess that's it for today!
Yawn.... time for a nap.
2 pages is enough already la....
The other 20 pages can read some other time....
Maybe after my nap?




And off Luke goes to nap.
A nap that rages out of control, eventually causing Luke to wake up at dinner time.
Total pages studied in one day: 2 (i think...)

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Friday, September 25, 2009

TIME!

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TIME!!!

I do not have enough time!!
Or rather i have too much activities to do to cram it all up in 1 day!!

Anyone can lend me something that can increase the amount of time in 1 day to 36 hours a day??


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Wednesday, September 16, 2009

I LOVE (scamming) YOU - Pt 3

2 comments
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Due to popular demand (which is quite difficult to find any demand in my blog anyway), i will continue on my pursuit of my Dear true love, Miss Joy Daudi from Africa and see where this journey will lead me to and of course, provide some entertainment for you who are reading this blog at the same time.


*/ Before that, same disclaimer again. Please read Part 1 and Part 2 of this
"I LOVE (scamming) YOU"
series before you start this post or you will have no idea what on earth am i blabbering about, which is quite bad actually considering how some of you will start going around proclaiming that i have found a girlfriend in Africa.
Not a good move as it could have quite unforeseen circumstances should it reach the ears of my mum back in Malaysia because, well, she's not that into interracial bonding. /*


Here Goes:

After waiting days and nights for a response from my DEAR Joy in Africa after sending her my last email, i realized that i would not be getting a reply after all from her.

I don't know, maybe there's a sandstorm going on there or the neighbouring African tribes have begun their raids on villages again or maybe someone have mistaken the internet cable for spaghetti yet again.

I guess the only way left is to contact the Habib Bank of Zurich and find this Mr Kevin Wood to help me save my DEAR Joy from that wretched camp.


First, i need to get the email address of this goddamn bank, of course.
A quick Google search did the trick and wah-lah, the banks' email address.

Okay, there's 4 choices on the website between Kenya, UK, Switzerland and UAE.
And the email that the bank from the Google result use is:


Hmm, funny.
The Habib Bank email that my DEAR gave me was:


Weird!

The emails are different!

If i were to use common sense here, what kind of a well established bank use their email accounts on Gmail server?

But like they say, love is blind right?
So i guess i have to go ahead and trust my DEAR.

With a catch, that is.
I'm going to send the same email to both of the Habib Bank email accounts and see what happens.


_______________________________________

To Mr Kevin Wood,
Senior Officer of Habib Bank


INQUIRIES REGARDING TRANSFER OF MONEY OF A HABIB BANK ACC
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Regarding the matter above, i have received an email from this lady claiming that she is Ms Joy Daudi, daughter of Dr. FREDRICK DAUDI who has an account in Habib Bank.

2. The reason of why i am contacting you, sir, is to offer myself as her foreign partner and assist her in the transfer of the remaining balance in the account so her evil step mother could not get the money and i will live happily ever after with her.

3. The account information are as follows:
ACCOUNT NAME IS: Dr. FREDRICK DAUDI .
ACCOUNT BALANCE : 6.8M POUNDS.
NEXT OF KIN : MISS JOY DAUDI.
ACCOUNT NUMBER: 4348300077421


4. I hope that you, sir, could assist me in this transaction and update me with the necessary information. Your help is greatly appreciated.

Thank You.

Yours sincerely,
Dr Skywalker


_______________________________________



Guess that's it then.
All i have to do now is wait for a reply and start thinking of where to buy a mansion, retire from NUS and enjoy life with my new African wife once i received the money.





to be continued....


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Thursday, September 10, 2009

I LOVE (scamming) YOU - Pt 2

5 comments
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(For those of you who have not yet read my last post, "I LOVE (scamming) YOU - Pt 1" please read it first or you will have no idea what am i blabbering about in this post! )

After many agonizing hours waiting for my "Love" to reply me,
finally i received an email from her!


"Dear Sweet-Heart

How was your night and I hope you are doing well.
Honey, I think of you day and night. Deep in my heart I know that our Love is here to stay. I am sending you all my love to show you how much I care for you.. Dear I have just send an e-mail to the Bank to formally introduce you to them as my foreign Partner/Representative. You can now contact where the money is deposited through this e-mail address:

HABIB BANK AG ZURICH.

(  ) or (  )

TELEPHONE NUMBER : 
THE ACCOUNT INFORMATION ARE AS FOLLOWS.
ACCOUNT NAME IS Dr. FREDRICK DAUDI .
ACCOUNT BALANCE = 6.8M POUNDS.
NEXT OF KIN : MISS JOY DAUDI.
ACCOUNT NUMBER 

When contact him, tell him that you're my foreign partner and that you want to assist me transfer SIX Million Eight Hundred Thousand British Pounds deposited by my late father of which I'm the next of kin Darling Keven wood is Senior office he is the one in position to tell us what to do to get this transfer done. My trusting you is an act of faith and it is the will of God. Secondly, I believe knowing you will bring my hope back again in my life days. Darling my contact to you is a miraculous thing that it never happened to me, although I am in praying and fasting, asking God to grant my heart desire, someone who will never betray me at last, some one who is not money conscious, but he is competent in what he have and that is due for him. My contact to you is not by mere of thought or coincident, it's will of God. He knows the inner heart of man kind, He is a loving God.

Please Dear, I want you to contact the Bank today because I want to leave this camp; the sufferings are becoming too much for me to bear and am looking forward to hear from you as soon as possible.

Thanks and GOD bless you.

With love from,
JOY"






Wow, she is FAST.


Either my "profile" somewhere has done a really good job at convincing her that i'm the love of her life
or
The hard years in the refugee camp have made her lose her mind over a handsome but cashless undergraduate student like me
or
It is just really a scam (Duh!).


And the more i looked at the message, the more i feel that the person behind this message is not a human at all but rather a machine that churns out automated response whenever there is a reply.

She did not even mention or ask anything about my job or even more details about myself!

And saying how much she love me and thinking about me.


It's surprising how someone still can be duped by such obvious scams. Well of course, we could not let the game stop here right?
So here's my reply:



"Honey,

Sometimes i wonder if you really have read my email. In my last email i think i asked you about the amount of money i need to prepare first as i'm afraid of these big bully banks cheating me. I have been cheated once by banks and i'm afraid it will repeat again. Once you have tell me the amount of money i need to transfer, rest assured that i will immediately contact the bank to transact the money.

And honey, i would appreciate it if you could send some more pictures of yourself to help me remind of you day and night. Thanks.

Please hang on honey, i will do my best to make sure that our destinies as lover will be fulfilled."




I'm beginning to enjoy this more and more. XD

to be continued....

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I LOVE (scamming) YOU - Pt 1

3 comments
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I'm pretty sure that we all have heard before of the typical African scams before.

The emails who arrive in your mailbox bearing the title "URGENT" or "REQUEST IMMEDIATE ASSISTANCE" with the sender saying that his some sort of director in a company (mostly in Africa) facing some crisis in which he cannot withdraw HUGE sum of money that rightfully is his or that his uncle or uncle's uncle (also mostly are African uncles) have died, leaving him again with HUGE sum of money which he cannot withdraw.

Hence the email requiring your kind assistance in giving some "processing fee" to release his funds and in return he would give you a portion of his HUGE sum of money.


I do not know why but seemingly somewhere deep in the internet there's a rumour going that says that i'm filthy rich and therefore a lot of this "Directors" and "Nephews" are flooding my email inbox asking for help.

Its such a pity actually to see Africa having so much of this company and family problems but heck, i'm too busy with my own company to care about GUYS.


Which might explain the change of tactics when an email arrived bearing the title
"Hello my dear"
from a girl named Joy Daudi from Africa (again) with the message

"Hello my dear
I'm miss joy daudi,5.4fit tall, slim stature,open minded, honest, trusted,caring and just to mention but a little. I hope honesty and trust they say build a strong relationship,no matter the distance that keeps us apart it still gives me the confident to write you this mail. I go through your profile today and it was very lovely .I will really appreciate it if we can click together as one great lovers ok.Please kindly mail me back with my private email id ()So that we can know about ourselves and I will give you my pictures for you to really know more about me .Please I'm waiting urgently to see your lovely mail soon.
Yours in love
Joy"




Funny considering that i did not post any sort of matchmaking profile before on the internet but well, what's the harm of playing along? I do not have any money to lose anyway because i'm just an undergraduate. So i fired back a message asking her more of her details which in reply she sent me this mail along with her pictures this time.


"Hello My Dear,

Thanks for your mail.how are you , i was touched after going through your profile. I think is no longer necessary for me to hide myself from you again and i decided to contact you because of the urgency of my situation here. My hobby is tennis and music.

I am Miss Joy Daudi, 24years old girl from Sierra Leone in West Africa,the only daughter of Late Dr & Mrs FREDRICK DAUDI, the former Director diamond extrusion Ltd in free town and also the former minister of mineral resources. I am constrained to contact you because of the maltreatment I am receiving from my step mother.

She planned to take away all my late father's treasury and properties from me since the unexpected death of my beloved Father.Meanwhile I wanted to travel to Europe, but ,she hide away my international passport and other valuable documents. Luckily she did not discover where I kept my father’s File which contains important documents.

So I decided to run to the refugee camp where I am presently seeking asylum under the United Nations High Commission for the Refugee here in Dakar, Republic of Senegal. I wish to contact you personally for a long term relationship and investment assistance in your Country.

My late father of blessed memory deposited the sum of US$9.200, 000.00 in a Bank in UK with my name as the next of kin. However, I shall be willing to forward you with the necessary documents on confirmation of your acceptance to assist me for the transfer and investment of the fund.

As you will help me in an investment, and i will like to complete my studies, as i was in my 2ND year in the university, when the crisis started. It is my intention to compensate you with 5% of the total money for your assistance and the balance shall be my investment capital. This is the reason why I decided to contact you.

Please all communications should be through this email address only for confidential purposes.As soon as I receive your positive response showing your interest I will put every things into action immediately. In the light of the above, I shall appreciate an urgent message indicating your ability and willingness to handle this transaction sincerely.

You can reach me on phone through the office number of the camp director, his name is Reverend Johnpaul and the phone number is +221765321337, if you will like to speak to me on phone.When you call tell him you want to talk to Joy Daudi,he will then send his receptionist to call me, i am staying at the female hostel block 104A. i will appreciate if you can also help me to secure my traveling document,maybe when i join you we can transfer the fund.

Awaiting your urgent and positive response. Please do keep this only to your self please i beg you not to disclose it till i come over to join you once the fund has been transferred.

Yours Sincerely.

Joy Daudi."



Awww, sad right. And after so many moral lessons at school and i by parents, not to mention the chance of meeting the "Love of my life" i sent her a reply containing:


"I'm very sorry about your predicament and happy at the same time that you were touched by my profile. As my profiles have mentioned, i'm 40 years old this year working as the Dean for Research at the National University of Malaysia and due to my position, i have been unable to be involved in a romantic relationship which is why i have posted my profile on numerous dating websites.

However, i would still hope to see some of your " necessary documents on confirmation" just to be sure in spite of the recent fraud cases. It is not that i do not trust you, it pains my heart to see such a lovely girl as you going through such ordeal and i would really want to help you but i need to be sure as these are savings for my marriage (if there's any).

And i would also appreciate it if you would disclose the rough amount that needs to be transfered so i can make the necessary preparations right away. Thank you and take care."


Hey nobody said i couldn't lie right?


to be continued...
*****









Meter (15 Malaysia)

0 comments
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15 Malaysia!

This is one of the best video man!
Try to spot the star studded appearances by Khairy Jamalludin (Malaysian BN MP), Baki Zainal (8TV Malay actor who speaks Mandarin), the pretty Amber Chia and even the controversial namewee!

A Must Watch!



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Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Psychology Research 1

5 comments
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In a recent research done by an aspiring psychologist, Mr Luke Phang Cher Hong recently on a group of undergraduates in National University of Singapore revealed some astonishing findings.


In the research, the handsome psychologist found that the undergraduates can be mainly separated into 3 groups which are the muggers, the "in betweens" and the slackers.

Muggers, as the name suggests, is people who mug over something or in other words devotes an large portion of their time in doing some sort of activity which is studying in this research.
This group of people rarely venture out of their room except to search for food and to dispose of the food they have eaten.
Study wins over everything to them, including girlfriends/boyfriends and they are the people who sits on top of the bell curve.

The "in betweens" are well, people who are in between the muggers and slackers and of course, they are the ideal group everyone should become because of the balance they have.

Slackers on the other hand, are the direct opposite of muggers. They rarely touch their books or even remember if they actually own a book.
These are the group of people who takes life easily and prefers play over work.


However, the research is still not completely finished yet because unfortunately, although he is quite handsome, the psychologist falls into the slackers group.

Which may explain why on earth is he updating his blog here when he should be actually writing the above things in a report for psychology work.

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