Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Get Your "Upholding Malay Race" Award now!

Did you read the news today? Apparently our dear Malay rights champion Ibrahim Ali has decided to do something explosive so he can appear in the newspaper headlines again. Using RM 5000 from who knows where (hopefully not from UMNO), he has decided to sponsor an award, called the Ibrahim Ali Award (what else?) at the University Teknologi Mara for students who performs extraordinarily in upholding the Malay race. (Source here)

Candidates must know silat too, or at least know how to use a keris

So in support of the "1Malaysia" spirit, the author at Lukeyishandsome has decided to come up with a guide on how you can help "uphold" the Malay race and earn yourself RM5000 along with an award with the handsome face of our dear Malay rights champion on it.

1. Treat all other races, be it Chinese, Indians, Jews and even Banglas as mortal enemies of the Malay race. Adopt a siege mentality that no other race except the Malay race is to be trusted. Everyone else with a different skin color is out to destroy the Malay race. Be paranoid, be very paranoid

2. Adopt a "ketuanan Melayu" mentality. Malays are the supreme race of the entire world, which are automatically entitled to all the special privileges of the world. There should be no equality, no questioning of those rights  that belongs to the Malays. The Malays NEED those special privileges to survive or else the Chinese will wipe the Malays out

3. Treat UMNO and Malays as the same. UMNO is Malays and Malays is UMNO. Whoever threatens UMNO is automatically an enemy of the Malays. And whoever that says UMNO is an enemy of Malays is not a Malay

4. Always play the race and religion card. Don't ever use logic or rationale in your statements. You cannot win by logic anyway. Whenever you debate with people with opposing opinions as you, just declare them as enemies of Islam will do. That's the standard operating procedure.

5. Never speak good English. English is the official language of the enemies of Islam anyway so whenever you speak, even with foreign media, use BM to show them that Malays don't need English to communicate. Others should learn BM, not Malays should learn English

6. Use a keris at every function, meeting, dinner and even at the toilet

7. Make sexist statements every now and then like how wives should stay in the kitchen and if husbands have affair, it's the wife's fault

8. Declare every anti-government movement to be of either communist, Jews or Christian infiltration attempts. Better still, declare any anti-government movement as all three in one.

9. Call your fellow Malaysians who are not bumiputeras pendatang or immigrants every now and then

10. 1Malaysia should not mean all races uniting together and sharing the same aspirations or anything to you. That's bullshit. Rather, 1Malaysia should actually mean 1Malaysahaja to you

So yeap, basically that's a very rough guide by Lukey on how you can be the "upholder" of the Malay race. We hope that you would have no problems following the guide and be able to win the Ibrahim Ali award with the RM5000 cash prize. And if you perform well enough, you might even get a home minister position in the cabinet. So good luck and all the best in obtaining the award.


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